Finding Happiness

Sometimes life throws you a curve ball. Or several curve balls in a row. It's at times like these that many of us turn to our families, finding in them the comfort and relief we crave. With our families we can achieve happiness, as long as we do the work necessary to strengthen our families every day. And it makes perfect sense: Daily training will improve our batting skills allowing us to hit those curve balls out of the park.

Over the course of its history many Presidents of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (or Mormons as they are commonly called), have taught us of the importance of families. Harold B. Lee (1899–1973), eleventh President of the Church said: “The most important of the Lord’s work you will ever do will be within the walls of your own homes.” (Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Harold B. Lee (2000), 134.)

This is something most people know instinctively, but we often feel driven to do those things contrary to this private desire. We feel to truly serve, we must do it outside the home, or it doesn't really count. But President Lee clearly taught us that first you must see to your families before all else.

President Ezra Taft Benson (1899–1994), thirteenth President of the Church confirms what President Lee taught. He said: “There can be no genuine happiness separate and apart from the home. The sweetest influences and associations of life are there.” (In Conference Report, Oct. 1947, 27.)

It's that sweetness that makes it a place of peace and refuge when those curve balls come flying fast and furious. Cultivate those relationships so they remain a source of joy for you and for your whole family.

One of the things you can do to strengthen the family and nurture the love and happiness that is found within your home is to have regular family prayer. President George Albert Smith (1870–1951), eighth President of the Church, taught “[Do] we want our homes to be happy[?] If we do, let them be the abiding place of prayer, thanksgiving and gratitude.” (In Conference Report, Apr. 1944, 32.)

What a wonderful thing, what a wonderful gift. To teach our children to pray, to pray with them, to live in thanksgiving and feel that peace that comes with a grateful heart and a happy home. We should all strive for such a heaven on earth.

Something else we can do to strengthen our family is to communicate always with love. Our children are very sensitive to the language we use as we set the tone and color for our family environment. These following quotes will illustrate this point:

Brigham Young (1801–77)
Second President of the Church

“The greatest difficulty that exists in the little bickerings and strifes of [families] … arises from the want of rightly understanding each other.” (Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Brigham Young (1997), 175.)

“Anger should never be permitted to rise in our bosoms, and words suggested by angry feelings should never be permitted to pass our lips.” (Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Brigham Young, 174.)

David O. McKay (1873–1970)
Ninth President of the Church

“We contribute to an ideal home by our character, by controlling our passions, our temper, by guarding our speech, because those things will make our homes what they are.” (In Conference Report, Oct. 1967, 149.)

Gordon B. Hinckley (1910–)
Fifteenth President of the Church

“There are good families everywhere. But there are too many who are in trouble. This is a malady with a cure. The prescription is simple and wonderfully effective. It is love.” (“Look to the Future,” Ensign, Nov. 1997, 69.)

You will notice that the doctrine of happiness in our families has been taught for over a hundred years in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. It is a true principle that will bless your home and your life, if you choose to believe and to live it.

I truly believe that the greatest blessings we have on this earth are our families. Cherish your loved ones and tend to their needs before all others. Dedicate time to family prayer. Speak to them with love. Daily training in family happiness will prepare you, and your children, for the game of life and you'll be happy.

Have I done any good in the world today?
Have I helped anyone in need?
Have I cheered up the sad and made someone feel glad?
If not, I have failed indeed.

Has anyone's burden been lighter today
Because I was willing to share?
Have the sick and the weary been helped on their way
When they needed my help was I there?

Then wake up and do something more
Than dream of your mansion above
Doing good is a pleasure, a joy beyond measure
A blessing of duty and love.
(Have I Done Any Good? LDS Hymn #223)

Music can be a powerful teacher and Mormons use a lot of music in their meetings to help people learn how to live righteously. I like this hymn because it teaches us that being happy is a daily choice we make in even the small things we do and say ... even the way we think. No one should feel they walk alone on the road of life, why should we let them? Reach out and help another, say a friendly word, thinking a kind thought.

Have you ever noticed how our face reflects what we're thinking? Even when we're not saying our negative thought out loud, it's reflection passes across our countenance and just as many hurtful daggers are thrown at the subject of our judgment. If even the momentary passage of a negative thought across our features can effect pain and sadness, think how sweetly a smile could lift and encourage.

Not to mention the side effects of positive thinking over negative. Thinking negative thoughts is like drinking sour milk. At first it goes down the same, and then a moment later we cringe as the bad aftertaste hits us and makes us sorry we took that drink without thinking. Positive thoughts, however, keep our minds open and ready to receive more nourishment from the world around us.

Elder Benjamin De Hoyos, a leader in the Mormon church said in his talk “True Happiness: A Conscious Decision,” (Liahona, Nov 2005, 31–32) “Happiness is a condition of the soul. This joyous state comes as a result of righteous living.”

Joseph Smith, the first prophet in this dispensation of the gospel of Jesus Christ, taught:

“Happiness is the object and design of our existence; and will be the end thereof, if we pursue the path that leads to it; and this path is virtue, uprightness, faithfulness, holiness, and keeping all the commandments of God.” (History of the Church, 5:134–35.)

I suggest that for today, you concentrate on virtue, starting with the things you say, that you do, even that which you think. Challenge yourself to think only good about the people you encounter today. Try to do good for another, for “[d]oing good is a pleasure, a joy beyond measure A blessing of duty and love.”

“Behold, I say unto you, wickedness never was happiness.

And now, my son, all men that are in ... the gall of bitterness and in the bonds of iniquity; they are without God in the world, and they have gone contrary to the nature of God; therefore, they are in a state contrary to the nature of happiness.”(Alma 41:10-11)

I really love this verse. I often find myself thinking, when tempted by something I probably ought not to be, “wickedness never was happiness.” The world, or all those influences that are so common day by day all around us, would have us believe that if it feels good than it is good. But if you've ever succumbed to some temptation you might have an idea of what I'm talking about. Sometimes something looks attractive and appealing, only to cost us more than we were ever benefited by it. Often our momentary pleasure costs us in misery, disappointment, even self-loathing.

When wrong actions continuously lead us to unhappiness and frustration, it's time to reconsider our approach to things and try a different course.

In the Book of Mormon, another testament of Jesus Christ, we read that a basic purpose of our life is “[to] have joy” (2 Ne 2:25.)

Elder Marcus B. Nash, a leader in the Mormon church, wrote in his article “The Great Plan of Happiness,” (Liahona, Nov 2006, 49–50):

“In order to have joy, you need to understand that, as a child of your Heavenly Father, you inherited divine traits and spiritual needs ... you need the gospel and the companionship of the Holy Ghost to be truly, deeply happy. Because you are the offspring of God (see Acts 17:28), it is incompatible with your eternal nature to do wrong and feel right. It cannot be done. It is part of your spiritual DNA, as it were, that peace, joy, and happiness will be yours only to the degree you live the gospel.”

Living the gospel, in this context meaning the gospel of Jesus Christ as taught by the Mormons in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, can be done even if you're not a Mormon yourself. You can know God's will for you by reading the scriptures, the Bible and the Book of Mormon, and by being obedient to the commandments and in striving to do good every day.

It's not as hard as it sounds, it's just a matter of choosing the good over the bad time each time you're faced with a choice. While it does take effort, the reward is well worth it. If you decide to take the easy way, the common way, by doing that which seems convenient, you'll only be cheating yourself of all the joy and happiness for which you were designed by your loving Father in Heaven.

The wonderful news is that as you make these hard choices you will discover happiness and will begin to build the foundation of your life upon “the rock of our Redeemer,” and when Satan tries to tempt you he will have “no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall” (Hel 5:12.)

I testify to you that wickedness truly does not bring happiness. And wickedness does not have to be the worse thing you imagine, wickedness is anything that is contrary to goodness, to living a Christ-centered life. I know the way can seem hard, but the rewards are many and you were built to receive them ~ it's in your DNA!

Mormons, or members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, tend to be happy people. I can't quote you any statistics, but just from what I see, I think it is true that Mormons are a happy people. I think there are probably lots of reasons why Mormons tend to be happy, from the encouragement to develop talents to the strong social network many Mormons enjoy. But the real reason why many Mormons are happy is because they have a strong belief in God and a desire to faithfully follow His commandants.

Many people are of the point of view that one cannot experience true happiness, only happy moments. However, I disagree. Fun can be considered a happy moment, but true happiness is the pleasure of living life with satisfaction or contentment. And I think the best way to find daily contentment is in obedience to a loving Father in Heaven's commands.

Mormons believe that God is more than just Deity. He is the Father of our spirits. Jesus Christ, under the direction of Heavenly Father, was the Creator of this earth. It was only when it came to the most important of Heavenly Father's creations, mankind, that He stepped in and took over. Because He is the Father of our spirits, He has a decided interest in our lives, in everything about us. Most of all, He desires us to be happy.

In the Book of Mormon, another testament of Jesus Christ, we read “[M]en are, that they might have joy.” (2 Ne 2:25) That is why God created us, so that we could have joy. His commandments are not meant to be a hindrance on our ability to have fun, but rather they are the blueprint whereby true happiness may be obtained.

Elder Claudio R. M. Costa is a leader in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. In his talk “Fun and Happiness,” (Liahona, Nov 2002, 92–94) he wrote:

“We are happy as we pray every morning and every night, when we can feel that the Lord hears us and is always willing to bless, forgive, and help us. We are happy as we feel the promptings of the Holy Ghost in our lives—as we feel the Spirit when we have to make important life decisions. We are happy as we go home after a stressful and tiresome day at work to the arms of our families, as they express love and appreciation for us. We are happy to talk to our children, to enjoy the family, to get together on family night. In short, we can feel happiness every day in our lives through little things we do, and we are fully happy as we keep the commandments of a loving God who cares about us.”

I am not happy every moment of every day, living in a blissful paradise, but I know where true happiness can be found ... by returning my thoughts to God and tuning my actions to suit His council. Like Elder Costa says, when I pray I receive comfort and strength that helps me to deal with my challenges. When I receive a prompting, or a feeling deep within my heart that feels like it is from God, and when I act on that prompting, I feel happy knowing I can be an instrument in God's hands. When life does get me down, I have a loving family that is a constant source of comfort and joy to me. Just like Elder Costa says, it truly is the little things we do that bring us the greatest happiness.

Maybe that's why Mormons are happy, because we are taught to live our religion daily and through the little observances of our faith, we can find continued and sustained happiness. If you're not a Mormon, but want to feel that daily infusion of happiness, I encourage you to pray more often, strive to be obedient to God's commands and open your heart to the richness of blessings He desires to shower upon you. Then you, too, could be happy, truly happy.

Are you feeling worn down by all the negative influences that surround? Is it hard to keep your chin up when everyone seems intent on bringing you down? Is it getting harder and harder for you to see the good in the world around you?

Then read on.

Today is the day that can choose where tomorrow will take you. Will you continue on your path of sadness and despair? Or will you have your eyes opened to the wonderful possibilities that surround you?

Elder Richard G. Scott, in his talk “How to Live Well Amid Increasing Evil,” (Liahona, May 2004, 100–102) taught us how:

“God has provided a way to live in this world and not be contaminated by the degrading pressures evil agents spread throughout it. You can live a virtuous, productive, righteous life by following the plan of protection created by your Father in Heaven: His plan of happiness. It is contained in the scriptures and in the inspired declarations of His prophets. He clothed your intelligence with spirit and made it possible for you to enjoy the wonder of a physical body. When you use that body in the way He has decreed, you will grow in strength and capacity, avoid transgression, and be abundantly blessed.”

These scriptures from both the Bible and the Book of Mormon confirm what Elder Scott has taught:

“All things must come to pass in their time. [God knew the challenges we would face when He gave this counsel.]

“Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things proceedeth that which is great.

“Behold, the Lord requireth the heart and a willing mind; and the willing and obedient shall eat the good of the land of Zion in these last days.” (D&C 64:32-34)

That is a priceless promise. As you continue to center your mind and heart in Him, He will help you have a rich and full life no matter what happens in the world around you.
Paul wisely taught, “Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.” (Rom. 12:21)

We should emulate Joshua: “Choose [ye] this day whom ye will serve; … as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” (D&C 24:8)

Finally this pattern of success: “Come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, … deny yourselves of all ungodliness, and love God with all your might, mind and strength, … that by his grace ye may be perfect in Christ.” (D&C 75:16)

These scriptures encapsulate the Lords plan of happiness and I testify to you that it can bless you anytime, anywhere. It does, however, require action and faith on your part. To receive the blessings, to receive the protection of this plan, you must first act. You must first Come unto Christ.

How does one 'come unto Christ'? By learning of him through personal prayer and scripture study. As you sincerely talk with your Savior daily, He will make Himself known unto you. Likewise, as you read the scriptures, His Spirit will attend you and you will have a greater understanding of your Savior and a greater desire to be like Him.

Once you come unto Christ, you can't quit. You must strive daily. The definition of strive is to “exert much effort or energy”. It is a constant effort, one applied regularly and with determination, you can never let up. Through such constant effort, you must deny yourself of all ungodliness. What does that mean? It means to live as you imagine Christ lived: without evil, without succumbing to the pressures of society, without those substances that would dull your senses and rob you of your conscience. Keep your mind and body clean so that you can freely receive the Holy Ghost to further guide and counsel you.

And you must love God with all your might, mind and strength. Like striving to be like Christ, this is a daily and constant effort. You cannot love God a little bit, or sometimes, but rather with all your heart, all the time. If you give yourself to Him to completely, He will bless you. You will be perfected in Him.

The best part of this plan is that it is quite forgiving: It is not “if you do all these things then you will be happy”. Rather, it is if you do these things you will be happy.” Elder Scott confirms: “Obedience will yield happiness”.

I encourage you to come unto Christ and find joy in Him. He loves you and desires to bless you, you only need to choose Him.

As I contemplate this season of Thanksgiving, I find it hard not to feel that overwhelming joy that comes when you recognize your blessings. I think of being surrounded by family, some of whom I haven't seen in a while, and my heart is full. I think of my children and the joy they freely express when they see their cousins and hug their aunts and uncles. I think of Christmas coming and I am thankful that this year we can spoil our children a bit and yes, that makes me happy. Most of all, I am thankful to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I am thankful for the Atonement because it has made me whole; because it has made joy possible.

I often think of the parable of the ten lepers: Jesus healed ten lepers, but only one returned to give thanks to the Lord for the wonderful gift of renewed health and wellness. Jesus then said “Thy faith hath made thee whole.” (Luke 17:19)

Sister Bonnie D. Parkin, in her talk “Gratitude: A Path to Happiness”, (Ensign, May 2007, 34–36) said of this verse:

“The leper’s expression of gratitude was recognized by the Savior as an expression of his faith. As we pray and express gratitude to a loving but unseen Heavenly Father, we are also expressing our faith in Him. Gratitude is our sweet acknowledgment of the Lord’s hand in our lives; it is an expression of our faith.”

Until I read that I had never entirely understood why Jesus said 'thy faith' rather than 'thy gratitude'. Now I understand that giving thanks is a symptom or byproduct of faith. Without faith we would not know to whom to give our thanks, we might even think we deserve the blessings or that they come wholly from our own actions. But I know that is not true. Because of faith in the Divine, I can see blessings everywhere I turn and I know to Whom to give my thanks.

Sister Parkin also said

“Gratitude requires awareness and effort, not only to feel it but to express it. Frequently we are oblivious to the Lord’s hand. We murmur, complain, resist, criticize; so often we are not grateful. In the Book of Mormon, we learn that those who murmur do not know “the dealings of that God who … created them.” (1 Ne: 2:12)”

It is important for us to set aside our murmurings in order to count our blessings. But once you make the effort, you will find it easier and easier to find the good amid the bad and then, through giving thanks you may find that the bad is tolerable.

My husband and I longed to have children. We felt it was the fulfillment of our existence and because it was a righteous desire we felt we would certainly be blessed. Time and again we found ourselves with child, only to have the baby die before it could be born. Finally, after many such experiences we discovered the cause of our losses: I had a disorder in my blood that would cause blood clots if left untreated. If we had managed to carry to term any of our pregnancies, untreated, the likelihood that my husband would either face the future alone or widowed with a small child, was high. If it had not been for our trial in having children, we might never have known about this hidden danger lurking within my body and because of it, my life was saved. Not all of life's challenges come with decoder rings, like this one I described. Many times we are left to endure our trials without any explanation. Nevertheless, “Thou shalt thank the Lord thy God in all things.” (D&C 59:7)

The Lord also said : “Be of good cheer, for I will lead you along. The kingdom is yours and the blessings thereof are yours, and the riches of eternity are yours. And he who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious.” (D&C 78:18-19)

Whatever your circumstance this holiday season, find something to be thankful for. Even the smallest of things can be cause for great thanksgiving. I promise you that once you begin to give thanks for the blessings you have been given, your heart and eyes will be open and you will soon find there are many more things for which to give thanks. Your Father in Heaven loves you and He longs to bless you. Happy Thanksgiving!

As a newly baptized member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, I had a strong testimony of the truthfulness of the Gospel. I had felt the Holy Ghost affirm its truth in my heart, and I had received personal revelation that I could not deny. My happiness in the gospel lasted for about five months.

Then I denied the truth I had once whole-heartedly embraced and turned my back on the Church.

What happened? How could one so fully converted be so easily swayed from the truth?

“The sower soweth the word.

And these are they by the way side, where the word is sown; but when they have heard, Satan cometh immediately, and taketh away the word that was sown in their hearts.

And these are they likewise which are sown on stony ground; who, when they have heard the word, immediately receive it with gladness;
And have no root in themselves, and so endure but for a time: afterward, when affliction or persecution ariseth for the word’s sake, immediately they are offended.

And these are they which are sown among thorns; such as hear the word,
And the cares of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, and the lusts of other things entering in, choke the word, and it becometh unfruitful.

And these are they which are sown on good ground; such as hear the word, and receive it, and bring forth fruit, some thirtyfold, some sixty, and some an hundred.” (Mark 4:14-20)

I was like the seed that was sown amongst the thorns. I had received the word and it had taken root, but the cares of the world choked the truth out of me. I actually went to my Bishop and asked that he strike my name from the records of the Church; he would not. Nevertheless, I left the Church in my heart. I can honestly say that what followed over the next four or five months were the worst challenges of my life, and that's saying something. I was lost, alone; the world that I had sacrificed much for, turned it's back on me. I was filled with guilt, shame, and a desperate need to be loved, to be happy, but there was none of that for me. Satan cares naught for our wellbeing once he has us firmly in his grasp, he only cares that we suffer.

Thankfully, the missionaries did not give up on me, and they continued to teach me the gospel. At first I was unrepentant and uninterested in their efforts. But eventually something one of them said got through to me and I left the door to my heart open just a crack. I began to see where my path had taken it's turn and how I might get back to the good path, the one that would lead me to happiness and joy. It was a long and arduous journey, much harder the second time around – after having received the fullness of the gospel – than it had been when I was being converted from ignorance to truth. This time I had committed my sins with full knowledge of Heavenly Father's plan for me, so the price of repentance was high. Still I persisted and soon my membership in the Church and the gospel's place in my heart was restored. No longer did I “droop in sin” (2Ne 4:28) but my heart was uplifted and my happiness renewed.

Through this difficult ordeal I learned that it is not enough to accept the gospel as truth, but full conversion is required. What does it mean to be fully converted? President Marion G. Romney explained:

“Converted means to turn from one belief or course of action to another. Conversion is a spiritual and moral change. Converted implies not merely mental acceptance of Jesus and his teachings but also a motivating faith in him and his gospel. A faith which works a transformation, an actual change in one’s understanding of life’s meaning and in his allegiance to God in interest, in thought, and in conduct. In one who is really wholly converted, desire for things contrary to the gospel of Jesus Christ has actually died. And substituted therefore is a love of God, with a fixed and controlling determination to keep his commandments.” ((in Conference Report, Oct. 1963, 24)

I learned that it is not enough to be 'converted to the gospel' as is often said about converts to the Church, but you must also be converted in your heart and in your mind. Your “desire for things contrary to the gospel of Jesus Christ [must] actually [die].”

Though the path to true conversion can be a rocky one fraught with turmoil and strife, I testify that it is a path worth walking. The glorious valley of happiness and peace awaits you and it's reward far outweighs any difficulty encountered along the way. Come and be converted to the Lord Jesus Christ. Write His name in your hearts and forsake sin, and you will find happiness and joy in His Light.

When I was a young adult, having fun usually involved going out with my friends to a bar or a club to dance and to drink. We had a great time, but there were always consequences to be paid. Sometimes the consequences were relatively minor, like a hangover or a broken budget. Other times more serious consequences might occur like the loss of one's dignity or reputation. All of this was the cost we paid for the pursuit of fun, and we paid it willingly.

When I joined the Church, my family and friends chastised me, thinking I was going to turn into a sour, boring fuddy-duddy. “You can't even have a drink?” they'd ask. They refused to believe I could think life could be fun without having a drink now and then. I felt it in my gut at the time, but now I know it to be true: giving up sin is getting freedom and freedom brings happiness.

Book of Mormon prophet, Alma, declared: “Behold, I say unto you, wickedness never was happiness.” (Alma 41:10) You cannot feel happy, truly happy, when you are simultaneously feeling guilt or shame because of your behavior, or when your senses are dulled by alcohol or drugs.

Our Father in Heaven created us to be happy. The Prophet Joseph Smith said, “Happiness is the object and design of our existence; and will be the end thereof, if we pursue the path that leads to it.” (History of the Church, 5:134.)

Jack H. Goaslind, in his article entitled “Happiness,” in the May 1985 Ensign, wrote:

“Our yearnings for happiness were implanted in our hearts by Deity. They represent a kind of homesickness, for we have a residual memory of our premortal existence. They are also a foretaste of the fulness of joy that is promised to the faithful. We can expect with perfect faith that our Father will fulfill our innermost longings for joy. In fact, the plan he has given to guide us is called “the plan of happiness.” (Alma 42:16) In the meridian of time, it was heralded by angelic messengers as “good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.” (Luke 2:10)”

This explanation of our desire for happiness is the best I have ever read and answers for my own mind why all people yearn for happiness so deeply. It's a part of who each and every one of us is, no matter the circumstances of our life. And so when we succumb to sin, it's all the more tragic because the commission of sin is in direct violation to our souls' innermost desire.

The wonderful news is that it is not too late to forsake our sins and experience the sweet joy that can be ours if we will repent. Not only will you feel a sort of freedom, like I felt, but you're senses will be heightened and the potential for fun – everywhere – will be made visible to you.

When you live a pure life, free from carnal distractions, you will find that you can answer the question “Are you having fun yet?” more and more often with a resounding “Yes!”. And the only consequence you'll have to pay is a fullness of joy in the life to come.

I have a unique marriage story that'll probably set your teeth on edge. The story is my own and it goes like this: I was a young woman of twenty-two when I wanted to serve a mission for the LDS Church. I prepared my papers with the help of my Bishop and everything was done except for the final review of the required steps and then for my Bishop to sign and submit the papers for me. At that final interview my Bishop offered a prayer on my behalf before signing the papers. When he finished praying, my sweet Bishop looked up at me and did not speak for a long moment. I felt a tingling sensation crawl over my skin: I suspected the Bishop had just received revelation on my behalf, but what could it be? When he finally spoke, he uttered words that had not been anywhere on my radar. My Bishop said “Ali, at this time I feel the Lord has a different mission in mind for you. I believe you should get married.”

I laughed out loud.

Married? Ha! There were precious few Mormon boys around and I had already dated all of them and nothing had come of it. I said as much to the Bishop.

“Well, I feel strongly, that there is someone here who the Lord intends for you to marry. I feel one month would be sufficient. Give the Lord one month to find you a husband and if you don't have a good offer of marriage in that time, I will sign and submit your mission papers.”

Keep in mind, this was 1990, it wasn't the dark ages. Still, one month wasn't really too much to ask and if it was revelation ... well ... I thought I'd better go along with it. But I wasn't at all convinced I would find a man – and a good marriage offer to boot! - within that time frame. I considered my mission had simply been delayed by a month, nothing more.

Until one day, like many others, when several of the youth in my Stake went to the airport to see off the missionaries who were leaving our area and heading back home at the conclusion of their mission. There was one among them, Elder Cross, who had been my friend. We had written a few letters and he had always been very encouraging of me serving a mission. When his flight was called we stood to shake hands in farewell. What happened next is amazing to me, even to this day.

When we shook hands I was, for lack of a better word, zapped. I yanked my hand away and just stared at Elder Cross. His Mission President's wife was standing right beside us and had witnessed this exchange. She exclaimed “Oh my goodness! You two are going to get married!” I forgot to mention that the one potential prospect I had for fulfilling the Bishop's prediction that I would find a husband within a month, was her son, who was not Elder Cross!

Elder Cross and I mumbled goodbyes, still rather stunned by what had transpired between us. I went home and prayed about what had happened, and I later found out he did the same. The answer we both received was the same: We were to marry. Two weeks later David called and asked me to marry him.

When I had my follow-up interview with my Bishop and reported my stunning news, he just smiled and confirmed that this was indeed the path my Heavenly Father desired for me.

So, why do I tell you this whole story? Because, as you can imagine, David and I came at our marriage with a different perspective than a lot of young people. We hadn't felt attracted to each other, hadn't desired each other, didn't really know each other well at all. And yet, we knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that we were to be together. Perhaps because of these things we knew we had to work at our marriage and we took nothing for granted.

We had a long distance courtship and were only physically together for nine days before we were married in the Logan Temple for time and all eternity. Perhaps because we felt we owed our being together to our Heavenly Father, we have often sought His help in all our trials. There have been obstacles to overcome, and there will yet be, but life has been happy and rich because we have a marriage based on mutual love and respect for one another and an unwavering faith in God.

It is my fervent belief that happiness is the goal and design of marriage. God intended for us to not only be one, but to be happy in that oneness. Adam, speaking of Eve, said, “This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh” (Gen 2:23) Elder James E. Faust in his talk entitled “Enriching Your Marriage” in the April 2007 Ensign said “We build our marriages with endless friendship, confidence, and integrity and also by ministering to and sustaining each other in our difficulties.”

Building a happy marriage takes constant and continued effort. No one goes through life blissfully happy without many rocks thrown at them along the way. There are troubles and trials that threaten to break apart even the most sound marriage. But there are things you can do to help protect and nurture your marital bond.

President Faust lists in his talk several tools that will enrich your marriage, among which are:

Prayer. Marriage relationships can be enriched by better communication. One important way is to pray together. This will resolve many of the differences, if there are any, between the couple before going to sleep.

Virtue. Virtue is the strong glue that holds it all together. Said the Lord, “Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her and none else” (D&C 42:22).

Divine presence. Of all that can bless marriages, there is one special enriching ingredient that above all else will help join a man and a woman together in a very real, sacred, spiritual sense. It is the presence of the divine in marriage.

There is nothing more sweet than kneeling down beside your partner at the end of the day to speak with your Heavenly Father. For one thing, you are more likely to hear wonderful things about yourself from the mouth of your partner when he or she is thanking God for you! But not only that, it is an opportunity to pray for one another, to show understanding of the trials our partner faces, and that we face together. Prayer offers the speaker the chance to express his innermost thoughts and feelings without interruption and the listener the chance to actively listen, hear and understand her partner.

When you pray for one another, you experience a deeper level of love that comes close to that emulated by Jesus, and that is charity. With charity in your heart for your partner, you experience the virtue spoken of by President Faust; you love one another like nothing else. And because there is charity in your hearts one for another, the Divine has license to dwell in your hearts and to further bless and administer to your union.

If you are facing divorce or your marriage is threatened in any way, I encourage you to read President's Faust's talk “Enriching Your Marriage”. Happiness can be yours and a sure and continued source of it can be found right at home, in your marriage. Pray for one another and invite God to be a partner with you in your union and you will find joy.

Missionaries know that very little teaching is needed once a person has read the Book of Mormon with an open heart. So little added instruction is needed because the Spirit will bear witness of the truth of the book all on it's own. Because of this, missionaries strongly encourage investigators to read the Book of Mormon. When the missionaries teaching me invited me to read, I at first had only a passing interest in the reading assignment but most of the time I didn't read it at all.

Even after I had come to feel quite enamored of the things the missionaries were teaching me, and had begun to read the Book of Mormon from the beginning on my own, I still didn't feel anything for or in the scriptures. One hundred and sixty eight pages into the Book of Mormon, I read the story of Abinadi. That singular story changed my life and changed my attitude toward the scriptures forever.

In Mosiah, chapters 11, 12 and 13, I read about how Abinadi's sure knowledge in the goodness of his God overwhelmed any fear he might have had in the face of the formidable King Noah. Abinadi was not to be swayed from the mission he had been given: To teach the gospel to the Lamanites and preach repentance unto all who would hear. Abinadi lost his life for his cause, but not before touching the heart of one man, Alma, who went on to influence generations with Abinadi's message.

For some reason, the story of Abinadi touched me like no other scripture ever had before. 'Touched me' doesn't even describe it: His story broadsided me, struck the breath out of me and knocked some serious sense into my muddled mind and confused heart. I encourage you to read it yourself, if you have not already done so. Start your reading in Mosiah 11:20; I pray you'll be inspired, as I was.

From that moment on, I read the scriptures every possible moment. I devoured them. Like Enos, a Book of Mormon prophet, “my soul hungered” for the word of God and I couldn't read enough. I read the Book of Mormon over seven times that year alone.

Still, to this day, I have a great and abiding love for the scriptures and can truly testify that they are the word of God and He speaks to us through them. I love all the scriptures, but particularly the Book of Mormon because they were written specifically for us today; and they are a boon to my life daily.

The thing about scripture reading, though, is that it must be undertaken with full presence of heart and mind. You can't casually read scripture and expect to benefit from them; if you do that, you're only reading words and words alone can't uplift you. To truly benefit from the scriptures, you must delve into them, absorb them, drink them up.

Elder Merrill J. Bateman said “... in order to come unto Christ and be perfected in him, each person needs to receive a testimony of the Lord’s words. Some individuals falter because they fail to open the books, others because they read casually. As one would expect, there is a difference between diligent searching or “pondering over the scriptures” and casual reading.” (“Coming unto Christ by Searching the Scriptures,” Ensign, Nov 1992,27)

This is so true, I had to share it. I have joy in reading the scriptures because they are like a meal to me, they truly feed my soul and enrich my life. However, I have personally experienced the difference when I have only read casually compared with when I have feasted upon them. In fact, even though I know that searching the scriptures is a verb and requires effort on my part and even though I know that I am greatly improved when I do that, I still often fall into the habit of casually reading so as to 'get in' my daily allotment of scripture-reading.

Another Book of Mormon prophet, Lehi, taught us how we could have joy, always, by feasting upon the scriptures. Lehi had a dream in which “[he] saw a tree which produced a fruit which was exceedingly white, very sweet to the taste, and desirable above all other fruit. He saw a path leading to the tree and a rod of iron along the path. He saw mists of darkness on the path, which caused some to lose their way and wander off. Others reached the tree by holding to the rod, but then became ashamed, let go of the rod of iron, and fell away. According to the vision, the only way to reach the tree and become a permanent partaker of the fruit was to “continually [hold] fast” to the iron rod. (1 Ne. 8:30)

What was the rod of iron? Nephi defined it as the “word of God”—the words of the living prophets and the scriptures, which point people to Christ. Nephi further stated that those who hearkened and held fast to the word of God would never perish. (See 1 Nephi 15:24)”

The tree in the dream is the tree of life, which represents God’s love for us as expressed in the condescension of the Father and the Son. (See 1 Ne. 11.) Holding fast to the iron rod builds faith in Christ and his work. (Merrill J. Bateman, “Coming unto Christ by Searching the Scriptures,” Ensign, Nov 1992, 27)

It took me a while to come to realize the true value of the scriptures and the wonderful nourishment they offered me. Now that I know that this feast lays prepared for me every day of my life, what joy I have! The scriptures are the iron rod that will lead us to eternal happiness and joy. Along the way, they offer our souls the nourishment and strength needed to make this perilous journey called life.

I know the scriptures, particularly the Book of Mormon, are the word of God and that they were given to us to feed our souls and nurture our minds so that we might find joy in our journey. I hope you will join and that together we may “feast upon the words of Christ.” (2 Ne 32:3)

The morning light shone warmly on Sarah's eyelids. She only sighed and let her body sink more deeply into her sleep-warm sheets. She had only just begun to drift back into sleep when she felt a tiny little something tracing over her face and heard the barely suppressed giggles of her youngest. Cracking one eye open just a hair she could spy Carly with one hand clamped over her mouth and the other hand dangling something over her mothers' face. Sarah tried to see what it was: Oh, a feather. That's what it was.

Playing along with the game, Sarah lazily swatted at the dangling feather and mumbled “Get away, fly.” It was hard to contain her own laughter when Carly's nearly exploded from her. Carly exhibited amazing self-control and patience for a three year old. She paused only a moment to get herself back under control, then began the slow drag of the feather across Sarah's face again. Sarah sighed again, actually enjoying the feeling of the light traces over her face, but especially enjoying the attention of her baby girl.

Finally she couldn't stand it any longer and with a roar she reached out and grabbed Carly, pulling her off her feet and dragging her into bed with her. Carly screamed with delight and quickly snuggled down into bed in between her still-sleeping daddy and her mom.

“'Mornin' Darling Carly” Sarah whispered into Carly's neck. Then she blew a big wet raspberry into the sweet remnants of Carly's baby fat. Carly's full throaty laughter bubbled forth and caught Sarah up in it's wake. A heated tickle battle ensued which threatened to wake Daddy up. He only grunted though and drifted back to sleep; no doubt dreaming he was adrift on storm-tossed seas. Sarah trapped Carly against the pillow and rested her forehead lightly against Carly's. She looked in to her large brown eyes, so warm and deep, and let herself drink it all in. This was a moment of sweetness and happiness she wouldn't let herself forget.

In response, Carly pulled her trapped arms out from along her sides and wrapped them around Sarah's neck.

“I love you Mommy,” she said.

Sarah pressed her face into her pillow and drew in a long breath. For a moment she believed she could smell the sweet fragrance of Carly's baby-self. She smiled and allowed the memory to linger a moment longer before climbing out of bed and facing her day.

When her feet swung over the edge of her bed and found her slippers waiting there, Sarah looked over to the full length mirror standing across the room. She smiled at herself. Her long white hair tussled and stringy from sleep, her wrinkled face worn our from an abundance of years on this earth, her heart full with remembering.

There's an old story that says an ungrateful man is like a hog under a tree eating apples. He never looks up to see where the apples come from. Do you ever look up?

President Ezra Taft Benson said “I hope we can be happy where we are, be grateful for our blessings—now, here—accept the challenge that is ours and make the most of it, and not be envious of others. … [May] God help us to be grateful for our blessings and never to be guilty of the sin ingratitude. (“All This and the Gospel Too,” New Era, Nov. 1991, pp. 4–7).

It's important for each of us to take the time to realize how many blessings we have, and to express appreciation and gratitude for them. Take a moment now, to jot down ten things you are grateful for, right this moment. You might list your health, good friends, good families, your faith. For every person the list will be different and may change even by the time of day or the mood you're in when you write it. If you write down ten things every day, then compile them at the end of the week, you'll probably find you have quite a list. Plus, an interesting thing happens when you begin counting your blessings: You find more and more of them to count!

“And in nothing doth man offend God, or against none is his wrath kindled, save those who confess not his hand in all things” (D&C 59:21)

Feeling gratitude is also important because it helps us to remember that we aren't in this alone. That we aren't strung out on a line, floating in the breeze, with no one to help us. God helps us. His blessings are constant and sure, even when we aren't taking note of them.

How do you feel when people express their gratitude to you? It warms your heart and encourages you to do more good things. We all would love to be appreciated more, why not start by appreciating others more too?

It is important that we all learn to express the feelings of a grateful heart. When you think of the words “Thank You”, what comes to mind? How do you feel when someone says these words to you? How often do you say these words to other people? Take another moment and write down a few specific ways you can express your appreciation to others. Some of my thoughts are:

Write a thoughtful note: I love to write a note of thanks because I can usually take my time and figure out just what to say. I also love to receive notes, so that's what my first inclination is.

I don't worry myself over using fancy words to express my feelings; getting caught up in such concerns can only cause you to procrastinate further. Rather, say what's in your heart. Say just what you feel, and say it like you mean it. It might only be one line of thanks, but if it's sincere, it'll be worth a thousand words.

Do a kind favor: I have a neighbor who is especially good at this. She is always doing just a little something for people around her. She doesn't usually do big things; just a plate of cookies, or she'll pick up the mail, or pull a few weeds. But it is always heart-felt and and sincere.

Pick up the phone: Often, the first moment when you feel the desire to give thanks is the moment when it should be done. If you're prone to procrastinate good works, then perhaps this is the best choice for you! A phone call of appreciation is never misplaced. But again, don't worry so much about what you say, only that your words are heartfelt and sincere.

Smile: The best way to let someone know that you appreciate what they are doing for you – especially in the moment – is to make eye contact with them and smile. Even if you don't have the opportunity to say the words of thanks in your heart, let the other person know you noticed and that you are thankful by blessing them with your smile.

Treat them with Sweets: Just a little chocolate on your son's pillow when he's finally cleaned up his room. Or your husband's favorite chocolate bar packed into his lunch (never mind that he might be on a diet). We often fail most often to thank the members of our own family, particularly if we perceive the act as one that is required or necessary, like when your boy takes out the garbage. Nevertheless, be grateful! Thank him, and perhaps he'll move ever-so-slightly less slow the next time you ask him to do it.

I'm sure if you think about it, you'll be able to think of your own ways to tell the people around you how grateful you are for the blessings they bring to your life.

Now, just one more assignment for you: Think about the thoughtful things done for you this week. Are there any good deeds for which you have yet to say “thank you”? You might want to remedy that situation.

Finally, look up. The scriptures tell us “And he who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious; and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea, more” (D&C 78:19) Look to the blessings your Father in Heaven has given you. You can't very well write him a note or bake him a plate of cookies. But you can get down on your knees and offer a sincere prayer of thanks. There may be additional blessings waiting to be poured out upon you, if you'll only have a grateful heart.

"Miserable people wallow. They just sit there. They don't have a "Things to Do" list, they have a "Things to Don't" list. They don't "go and do" they sit and stew." (John Bytheway, How To Be Totally Miserable, p.9)

This year over 20,000 runners competed in the Boston Marathon. For the second year in a row, Robert Cheruiyot won the race and brought home the big prize. It was a lot of money - a literal pot of gold to the once impoverished man and his family. The thing about Cheruiyot is though, that at one point in his life, he considered giving up on everything:

"I was supposed to kill myself because life was very hard," he says. "I had never seen my mother, never seen my father. We were all living differently. I don't know what made me want to kill myself. I just wanted to do it."

Robert had no skills, no hope for the future, not even any money to feed his hunger. But one day he decided that where once he had shown some promise in soccer and long distance running, perhaps he could again. Rather than sitting and simmering over all the injustices he had experienced, he laced on some hand-me-down training shoes and went running.

While running, a driver for a local FILA camp saw Cheruiyot and invited him to the running camp. Even though his opportunities had increased, at first it was still difficult for Cheruiyot to make the necessary changes. His trainers were concerned that he ate more than he ran. Cheruiyot was at another crossroads; he could make a life change from this new opportunity, or he could sit and wallow because after all, life had never been kind to him.

What did Robert Cheruiyot decide to do? He decided to run. He ran and ran ... running his way into an $80,000 purse in 2006 and a $100,000 purse in 2007. When asked if he sensed a divine hand in all of his success, Cheruiyot replied, "The Almighty Father? Always."

I don't suppose that running a twenty six mile marathon is a piece of cake for anyone. And I imagine there are many stories like Cheruiyot's amongst the runners; stories of people overcoming personal tragedy to obtain life-long victory. Whatever their stories may be, each and everyone of those runners made the choice to "Just Do It."

"Arise; for this matter belongeth unto thee: ... be of good courage, and do it." (Ezra 10:4)

I bet the Nike people didn't realize they were borrowing a motivational slogan from the Old Testament when they started going around saying "Just Do It." But I also don't think Heavenly Father would mind. He gave us our bodies for a good purpose, to use them. He gave us our minds that we mind use them, with speed and agility. And if either of those things prove challenging for us, He gave us the tools with which to improve ourselves.

The Boston Marathon runs divisions for wheelchair, the blind/visually impaired and the mobility impaired. Running a marathon can't be easy for anyone, but certainly you have got to admire the stamina and courage it takes to take on something so vast when you have a physical impairment to overcome. These people, so obviously challenged, could have stayed home and sat on their couches and watched the race on T.V. They could have watched the race and wished wistfully, "If only ... " But they didn't wish it, they made it happen.

The old adage, "The Lord helps those who help themselves" is as true today today as it was when your Grandmother learned it at the knee of her grandmother. Your challenge may not be running a marathon; for some of us just getting up to face the day can be as great a challenge.

Don't be one of those who "sit and stew". Do something good for your body, for your spirit, and "go and do". I can guarantee you'll be happier for it!

Take a moment and picture the eternities. What do you see for yourself?

I used to have rather ephemeral visions of heaven; maybe I would be transformed into an angel and would spend my days playing the harp while sitting on a cloud. Now that I have a family of my own, my idea of heaven is rather simple; to spend it in the company of my loved ones, experiencing the joys of familial bonds.

I take great comfort from this belief of my Church; that families can be together forever.

A basic eternal truth of this Church is that families may, if they are worthy, have an eternal relationship; for us it would not be heaven without our parents, our grandparents, our eternal companions, our children, and our posterity. This union of families comes through the sealing power exercised within the hallowed walls of the temples under authorized priesthood authority.(James E. Faust, “Eternity Lies before Us,” Ensign, May 1997, 18)

My mother-in-law is currently suffering from a deadly disease and does not have long on this earth. Many discussions revolve around her death and what lays beyond. I cannot help but dwell upon similar conversations with my own mom twenty years ago.

My mom believed in God, and believed there was a heaven; but she did not know what to expect and the unknown was frightening to her. My mother-in-law, however, has a firm belief that heaven is the place where her loved ones, who have already passed on, are anxiously waiting to receive her. She envisions a place of familiar faces, happiness beyond anything she's experienced in this earthly vale and joy in being home again with her Eternal Father.

Oh what joy such knowledge brings!

And moreover, I would desire that ye should consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. For behold, they are blessed in all things, both temporal and spiritual; and if they hold out faithful to the end they are received into heaven, that thereby they may dwell with God in a state of never-ending happiness. Mosiah 2:41

It's impossible for me not to compare these two distinct experiences, that are at the same time completely different from one another and painfully similar. On the one hand, there was my mom, alone and unsure of what lay ahead for her. There was also us, her children, who weren't sure what to make of the eternities either, or if they even existed. She sorrowed not only to leave us, but also and especially, she sorrowed to go into the great unknown.

However my mother-in-law is surrounded by loved ones, receives blessings of comfort at the hands of worthy priesthood holders regularly, and has a sure knowledge in what lays in store for her; a reunion with her own parents, siblings who have passed, and family that extends to the beginning of time. She has lived a good life, she has kept the commandments of God; she has every right to have hope in her eternal salvation. While she is sad to leave her family, she also feels great excitement and joy at the prospect of what comes next for her.

As a child, I am overwhelmed by my intense feelings. Since I joined the Church in 1990, I know where my mom is now and so I have no more sadness or fear for her. I believe she repented sufficiently and, with a humble and contrite heart, she was received into her Father's presence. As for my mother-in-law, I know where she is going and I am so happy for her. I am happy for us, her children and her grandchildren because as long as we live worthily we can look forward to being with her again some day too.

Goodbye is not forever. It is only a mere passing of time that will be all for naught when all is said and done. There is a favorite LDS Hymn that I love:

I have a fam'ly here on earth.
They are so good to me.
I want to share my life with them,through all eternity.
Fam'lies can be together forever,
Through Heavn'ly Father's plan.
I always want to be with my own family,
And the Lord has shown me how I can.
The Lord has shown me how I can.
LDS Hymns, #300

Happiness is knowing that our families are eternal, that we can be together forever, some day.

There is sunshine in my soul today,
More glorious and bright
than glows in any earthly sky,
For Jesus is my light.

Oh, there's sunshine, blessed sunshine
When the peaceful, happy moments roll.
When Jesus shows His smiling face,
There is sunshine in the soul.
(LDS Hymn #227)

It's difficult for me to find the words to express the feelings in my heart at this moment. This hymn says it all.

I love my Savior. I am grateful for Him.

I have lived a hard life and made many mistakes along the way. When I sat by my mom's bedside while she lay dying, my mom felt such fear and dread at what might lay beyond the veil for her. She did not have confidence in her salvation. We read Psalm 27 over and over again in hopes that it would bring her comfort, and many times she asked me to pray out loud for her. She felt her own prayers might not be heard.

The cause of my mom's heartache was her own shame over the choices she had made in her life. While she longed for forgiveness and a place in the Father's Kingdom, she felt unworthy to ask for it.

I, too, have made many mistakes that made me feel unworthy of my Father's love. I feared He could not love me, or want to claim me as His own. However, since the missionaries taught me about the Plan of Happiness, my life has been changed - I have been changed.

I now know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that my Father loves me - He always loves me. Would a loving Father turn His back on a lonely and wayward child? No. Nor will your Father in Heaven. Because of our Savior's atonement, freedom from sin can be ours. Because of His sacrifice for us, we are worthy, we are clean, to enter into our Father's presence once again.

Because the Great Gardner tends His garden in my heart daily, there is always sunshine.

Today is Fast Sunday. In the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, the first Sunday of every month is a Fast and Testimony meeting. The members of the Church, forgo food and drink for two consecutive meals. "Fasting combined with sincere prayer can strengthen us spiritually, bring us closer to God, and help us prepare ourselves and others to receive His blessings." (lds.org, gospel library)

I love Fast and Testimony meetings. Sure, I don't always love fasting, but after a few times you get used to it and usually it's not difficult. Members of the Church are also encouraged to give Fast Offerings; donations to the needy in our area of the money would have spent on the meals we skipped. The best part of a Fast and Testimony meeting though, are the testimonies.

LDS.org defines a testimony in the following way:

A testimony is a spiritual witness given by the Holy Ghost. The foundation of a testimony is the knowledge that Heavenly Father lives and loves His children; that Jesus Christ lives, that He is the Son of God, and that He carried out the infinite Atonement; that Joseph Smith is the prophet of God who was called to restore the gospel; that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the Savior's true Church on the earth; and that the Church is led by a living prophet today. With this foundation, a testimony grows to include all principles of the gospel.

The first LDS Church meeting I ever attended was a Fast and Testimony meeting. I thought it was the strangest thing. For one thing, I was accustomed to one individual person leading the church meeting, whereas at a Testimony meeting, anyone who wants to can have the pulpit for a moment or two to express their thoughts and feelings. Though at first distracted by the unique format, I was soon moved and touched by the things that people shared.

The people spoke of their love and gratitude for the members of their Church. They spoke of their gratitude for the gospel and how it had blessed their lives. It was beautiful.

At the time, I was a wandering soul. In fact, I had been for much of my life. Even as a young girl, I longed for a connection with my God and I looked wherever I could to find Him. At that LDS meeting, that Fast and Testimony Sunday, I felt certain that the people there had found Him, and perhaps I could too. I actually stood and bore my testimony that day! Well, it probably wasn't really a testimony, but I stood and told the members gathered there how grateful I was for the kind reception they had given me and for the words they had shared. I was grateful for the missionaries who were young like me, and still gave up their lives for two years to go and preach the gospel. I felt that if they were willing to do that then there must be something real and special about this religion. I told them that I wanted to feel what they felt, to have my heart filled like theirs were.

It's been almost eighteen years now since I attended my first Fast and Testimony meeting and my joy in them has not diminished. I love to attend; they are my favorite meeting of the month. I don't always bear my testimony, but I always listen with an open heart and am never disappointed; I come away with my heart filled to overflowing.

At a Testimony meeting you will hear the heartfelt feelings expressed from every sort of person. A child might bear her testimony of how she knows the Church is True and she loves Jesus. A young mother might express her gratitude for the newborn child she has been blessed with. A father might express his certain knowledge of the sure guidance of a loving Father in Heaven, while a young man might express his absolute confidence in the atonement of Jesus Christ. An old woman might share her love for the gospel and express thanks for it's continued comfort through her life. There is so much to be learned from the honest expression of a testimony, but it must be received with an open heart.

For me, I go expecting to be filled, expecting to feel the Spirit and searching my heart and mind for what I might share that might be of use to those congregated there. Today I might say my testimony out loud, but even if I don't, it is always singing loud and clear in my heart for it is never more than a thought away.

I know my Redeemer lives. I know He loves me. There is no other thing or person in my life that fills my heart with such joy as this sweet knowledge. I am a child of God. My joy is full.

I am fat. I am ugly. No one likes me. I'm not smart enough. I'm not talented enough. I'm worthless.

Do these lies sound familiar to you?

Yes, I said lies. Oh, they might contain slivers of truth; the Adversary likes to work that way. He will tell you things that are partially true so that you are inclined to believe them, while at the same time inundating you with non-truths as well. "And also Satan hath sought to deceive you, that he might overthrow you." (D&C 50:3)

"In all of this, I suppose it goes without saying that negative speaking so often flows from negative thinking, including negative thinking about ourselves. We see our own faults, we speak—or at least think—critically of ourselves, and before long that is how we see everyone and everything. No sunshine, no roses, no promise of hope or happiness. Before long we and everybody around us are miserable." (Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, "The Tongue of Angels, Ensign May 2007)

Have you ever heard of positive affirmations? Our minds are susceptible to the propaganda we subject them to. If we tell ourselves how awful we are, we are bound to believe it. Thankfully, the converse is also true: Our minds will believe the wonderful things we tell it about ourselves, too.

"The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God:

And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together.

For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us." (Romans 8:16-18)

You can be happy, if you can find a way to believe in yourself.

"I love what Elder Orson F. Whitney once said: "The spirit of the gospel is optimistic; it trusts in God and looks on the bright side of things. The opposite or pessimistic spirit drags men down and away from God, looks on the dark side, murmurs, complains, and is slow to yield obedience." We should honor the Savior's declaration to "be of good cheer." (Indeed, it seems to me we may be more guilty of breaking that commandment than almost any other!) Speak hopefully. Speak encouragingly, including about yourself. Try not to complain and moan incessantly. As someone once said, "Even in the golden age of civilization someone undoubtedly grumbled that everything looked too yellow."" (Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, "The Tongue of Angels, Ensign May 2007)

So let's break it down. I want to help you find happiness again, to see in yourself what your Father in Heaven sees in you.

Speak Hopefully: Look to the future and for the good it can bring. If you expect good things to happen, good will happen.

Speak Encouragingly including about yourself: This is the most important point for today, I think. We all know you can't beat a dog and expect it to continue to love you and be obedient. Why then do we think we can beat ourselves up all day long and expect anything more from ourselves than constant disappointment?

If you want to see some different results, try some different methods. I like the positive affirmation. Sometimes I feel silly, it's true, but I do believe it works. Every now and then I have to break out the feel-good statements and say them to myself a lot over a few days' time. Invariably, before too long I feel much better. You can say anything that works for you; I like "I'm a good and kind person and people like me." Say it with a smile on your face. And say it like you mean it!

Motivational guru Zig Ziglar said, “The most influential person who will talk to you all day is you, so you should be very careful about what you say to you.”

Don't be so down on yourself. Don't be so critical of your success, or lack thereof, so far in your life. Choose happiness, choose to believe in yourself.

Think: "I look great!"; "I am beautiful."; "People like me."; "I'm smart."; "I have valuable talents and skills."; "I deserve to be happy because I am a child of God and He loves me."